Conscience
by Ssenillek Reh
Summary: KHI, Monstro. Riku. What did conscience have to do with anything? He was trying to save Kairi. Christ, why couldn't Sora understand that?


**Title:** Conscience**  
Author:** Kel**  
Genre:** Drama-ish/Angst-ish? I've no idea. XD**  
Pairings:** kind-of-one-sided Riku/Sora**  
Warnings:** mentions of slight Riku/Sora slash**  
Summary:** [KHI, Monstro. Riku.] What did conscience have to do with anything? He needed to save Kairi. Christ, why couldn't Sora understand that?**  
Disclaimer:** I don't have a cool Asian name, so I can't own Kingdom Hearts, unfortunately enough. Besides, there'd be a lot more Riku/Sora action if I owned it. XD

**A/N:** I found this in an _**extremely**_ old notebook of mine – dated several hundred years ago or so (so, you know, like six years ago, in junior high XD). So this was written forever and a day ago, when I was young and inexperienced (most of my writing from way back when makes me cringe now when I happen upon it), but this wasn't half-bad. I only tweaked it a little bit, and am quite pleased with the overall result. :]

* * *

"_Heart or no heart, at least he still has a conscience."_

A _conscience_? He was so shocked that he repeated the words out loud like a mindless parrot.

What did _conscience_ have to do with anything? He was trying to save Kairi – what part of that was so hard for Sora to understand? The puppet – and it was only a _puppet_, for Chrissakes! – had lost its heart (and whoever heard of a puppet having a heart, anyway?), so what did it matter if that silly old man still wanted it? He could always make another one, couldn't he?

Besides, this was more important. He needed to save Kairi.

_Christ_, why couldn't Sora _understand_ that?

"_You might not be able to hear it, but it's loud and clear."_

He didn't know what had gotten into his younger friend. He didn't know what all this business was with Keyblades and masters and closing portals between worlds (and why would Sora want to do that? Hadn't they promised each other, years ago, that they would travel together, visit every single world out there?), but it was ridiculous. Sora _said_ he cared, _said_ he'd been searching for those he called friends – but was it the truth? It seemed unlikely, especially since meeting those _new_ friends of his. (And, he swore to God, if that duck gave him one more dirty look, he would flambé the stupid thing and serve it for Christmas dinner. Really.)

When he'd offered to team up with Sora to double their efforts in helping Kairi – because she was the most important thing to both of them, besides each other, he knew – the _last_ thing he'd expected was for Sora to raise that Keyblade at him – he didn't even think Sora realized the defensive stance he slipped into, much less the fiercely intense look on his face, the one that _screamed_ he would do whatever it took to make things right and _succeed_ at doing so. He'd only seen that look a handful of times in all the years and years he'd known the brunet, and the fact that it appeared _now_, against _him_, his best friend (or so Sora said), made him distinctly uncomfortable.

"_And it's telling me that you're on the wrong side!"_

Touché, Sora.

How could Sora think _he_ was in the right? He wasn't the one tirelessly searching for a way to save Kairi, was he?

No. Instead, he was trying to save _puppets_ – the puppet that, incidentally, could be the key to saving Kairi (which should've been the most important thing to Sora – the boy needed to reexamine his priorities).

He'd never wanted to throttle Sora so badly before. He just didn't _understand_!

* * *

_It was never about sharing a paopu fruit with Kairi – and it certainly wasn't about naming their raft, though the thing _did_ need a name – a christening, so to speak._

_Who cared about a stupid fruit, anyhow? He, Sora, and Kairi were best friends – their destinies were _already_ intertwined; they didn't need some fruit to tell them _that_._

_No, this was about – he cringed – Sora's feelings for Kairi._

_How strong were they? Was he – _romantically_ interested in her? Did he like her _that way_?_

_Not that he cared, he told himself firmly – who Sora liked and didn't like was none of his business._

_But he had to know._

"Boys will be boys, I guess."

_Say Sora _did_ have those feelings for Kairi – what if he acted on them? What if he became nothing more than a third wheel to Sora and Kairi, dragging down their bludgeoning romance?_

_Or say things didn't work out between them – what then? What if they couldn't maintain their friendship? What if he was forced to choose between them?_

_He couldn't do that._

_Of course, his speculation was only valid if Sora _did_ harbor those more-than-friend feelings for Kairi._

_And he planned to find out – with that damn papou fruit._

"You're crazy, you know? Wakka agrees with me, and I know Selphie does too – you and Sora are both so blind! Try talking to him – you'll be surprised."

_He didn't _think_ Sora felt that way, and he didn't know why he had to know, but… _he had to know.

_And if Kairi didn't stop laughing at him, he was going to hit her._

_He didn't know what she was on about – he didn't like Sora _like that_, no way!_

_Really._

_All the same, he had to know._

_Sora _couldn't_ like Kairi. Not like that._

_He just _couldn't.

* * *

He took a small step toward the younger boy, determined to make him _see_, make him _understand_ – but faltered when Sora shifted the Keyblade slightly in response.

He realized that Sora _wasn't willing_ to listen.

His mind went numb with shock, but a distant part of his brain screamed, _'since when were _you_ the unreasonable one?!'_

Before he could react physically (namely by grabbing Sora's shoulders and shaking him so hard his head rolled off), a rumble from above made his head snap up, and he gaped as the _thing_ he had just defeated alongside Sora (and what had _happened_ to that easy camaraderie, that natural teamwork between them? – Oh, right: that damn puppet – and curse it all, where did it _go_?) fell from nowhere.

He saw Sora's attention immediately shift to the bigger threat, and he could sense the brunet's bewilderment as easily as his own – after all, they'd been best friends for longer than he could remember.

Sora's best friend screamed to help him against that abomination, but Kairi's pull was stronger.

The truth hit him like a slap to the face: Sora's interests no longer lay in congruence with his own.

He pulled a small gem from his pocket, Maleficent's words pounding in his ears – _"use this only in extreme circumstances, only when you cannot escape any other way"_ – and dropped it to the floor, only mildly surprised when it disappeared, leaving a pearly white portal in its wake. He didn't trust Maleficent as far as he could throw her (and he sincerely doubted she'd ever let him get _close_ enough to throw her), but as long as she thought he was on her side (really, he wasn't on anyone's side but his own – and Kairi's) and was willing to help him save his red-haired friend, he knew he had nothing to fear from her. Even if she _did_ scare him a little.

Besides, he reasoned with himself, Sora would be fine. After all, didn't he have his precious _Keyblade_ and his new _friends_ to help him now?

Sora would be fine, for now. He would understand – he _had_ to. This was for Kairi.

And Riku stepped through the portal and let Maleficent's magic – man, did it leave a nasty taste in his mouth! – whisk him away, ignoring the shattering of his heart.


End file.
